graduation...

I still can't believe that I can now say I am a college graduate. Saturday night was so surreal for me because I knew it was happening but it all felt like a wonderful dream. All of the graduates lined up in the back of the arena in designated areas due to the degree we had earned. When it was time to walk out in front of the audience, the entire faculty and staff lined up on each side of us to make a walkway. They clapped and congratulated us as we walked by and though my eyes were misty, the tears didn't fall until I heard Dr. B, my coding professor, yelling mine and my sisters names and cheering us on.  (I don't know if I have mentioned this before, but my sister and I entered college at the same time and we majored in the same field so each semester we created our schedules to match so we could take our classes together). I could hear the audience begin to cheer as the first of the line of graduates entered the seating area in the arena. Being among the shortest of graduates, I couldn't find my family in the audience.  My sister was behind me and with her being almost 6 feet tall with about a two inch heeled shoe on, she found our family. I cannot put into words the joy and pride I felt walking across that stage to shake the college president's hand. After the ceremony our entire family went out dinner together. All in all, it was one of the best nights of my life.

Now that graduation is over, I'm having some feelings that I didn't expect. I am so happy I graduated but at the same time I feel a little sad and lost. Sad because I loved college, or to be more specific I loved learning. Lost because even though I'm going to be working a good job with good pay and great benefits, I already miss school. Right now I'm thinking some of this will wear off. First, I still have all kinds of emotion running through me from achieving my goal of earning a degree, and second because sometimes it takes me a little while to adapt to change. Well, adapt really isn't the word to use because I can adapt quickly. It's more that my mind needs a while to analyze and get through the acceptance of the adaption. Either way I will be fine! If I can't get over the feeling of being lost without school then the answer is clear to me, go for a bachelor's. It's not like I can't ever go back to school.

Dreams do come true....

Well, the last time I stopped in I was a little over half way through my semester and now I am four days from graduating. I honestly cannot believe this moment has finally came. After finishing my accounting final exam this morning it seems all I can think about is the past 35 months of school and the experience of it all. This train of thought lead me to think about several things Randy Pausch said in his lecture The Last Lecture: Achieving your childhood dreams. First of all he talks about how we always run into brick walls (obstacles) and then he goes on to give a great explanation to why those brick walls are there. He says, "the brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” Being a non-traditional student, I certainly understood exactly what he was meaning.  I look back and think of all the younger students I came in contact with along my way and 99.5 % of them were there because it was expected of them or because they were made to come. These students float by and sometimes they only do enough to pass the class and earn the credits. It still breaks my heart today and brings out the "mom friend" in me when I see a student who is only there to please someone else. I want to encourage them to realize what a precious gift they have by getting to attend school and by doing it at such a young age. There are kids and adults all over the world who would give almost anything to have the chance to further their education. I guess it matters to me so much because I have been on the other end of the spectrum of thinking I didn't have a chance to further my education.

One of my favorite things Randy Pausch said was, "Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted. And experience is often the most valuable thing you have to offer." That is the truth if I have ever heard it! It's not always about achieving your dreams, but the experience you get along the way and what an experience I have had. Before going to school I thought when one goes to college they go to become an expert in a certain career field; however, I quickly learned that it's about learning how to really think and analyze everything, solving problems on your own, and being an educated person in an ever growing society, educationally speaking.

If you have never listened to Mr. Pausch's lecture I advise you to. Grab some kleenex and be prepared to cry your eyes out. The thing about Mr. Pausch is that he didn't want to do this lecture at all because he didn't want to take away time remaining for him. Time was a precious item to him because shortly before being approached about this lecture he was told by his doctors that his pancreatic cancer was now terminal and he only had 3-6 months to live. It is a great lecture.